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The Luxury Podcast

ByAudio Always
96 episodes

Podcast Summary

In each episode of The Luxury Podcast, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith will tackle an area of life that they think you should upgrade, helping you create the everyday moments of luxury that make life worth living, and sorting the Onslows from the Hyacinths. Join William and Jonathan as they advise the nation in gracious living, and help you to live a more luxury life.Find us on other platforms here - https://audioalways.lnk.to/theluxurypodcastTTIf you're interested in sponsorship and advertising in The Luxury Podcast, then we'd love to hear from you. Just email [email protected] and we'll tell you more! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

#1

Deickes, Yanks and Roundheads

In this week's bonus episode, William and Jonathan host the podcast via their executive telephones, from New York and Hertfordshire respectively. William provides some fascinating insights into luxury life across the pond, and the two give some advice to a listener caught in a posh/common identity crisis. Plus, a listener weighs in on pronunciation problems, and some cutting edge circumcision chat is had. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-06-05•26mins
#2

Restaurants

In this episode, William and Jonathan discuss the dos and don’ts of restaurant etiquette - everything from bills to baby-led weaning. Plus, William considers an alternative career, and battles with an uncharacteristically potty mouth. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-06-04•49mins
#3

Duvet Related Death Penalties

In this week's bonus episode, Jonathan and William discuss how to deal with people who don't make the bed. Jonathan gives a sneak peak from his memoirs, and William provides another surprising update about his house sale. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-29•24mins
#4

Childhood

In this week's episode, William and Jonathan revisit their childhoods - including their early media debuts (featuring a special audio cameo from a very young Jonathan Vernon-Smith).Plus, they revisit their childhood hobbies - including, but not limited to, arson and crossdressing - and provide some luxury parenting tips. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-28•40mins
#5

Escalator Tumbles and Nighttime Happenings

In this week's bonus episode, William and Jonathan exchange notes on their after-dark experiences. Plus, Jonathan overcomes man flu to share his theory on what finding a single shoe on the pavement means, and finds creative ways to pronounce the names of not just one, but two listeners. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-22•33mins
#6

Neighbours

William and Jonathan tackle neighbours in this episode: and in fact, Jonathan tells a story of how he nearly literally tackled one, during a 'red mist' episode. Alongside that anecdote are other gems including 'Cecil's Gloryhole', and 'Barbara's Vibrator'. Plus, tips on navigating bin day, neighbourhood WhatsApp chats, and whether it's ever appropriate to pay next door a visit unannounced. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-21•39mins
#7

Your Luxury Letters

In this week's bonus episode, William and Jonathan discuss William's ball problem, before examining the sack - they open up the mailsack and go through your wonderfully luxurious letters. Topics of discussion include tattoos, tipping, and telephone etiquette. Plus, how to deal with particularly large loads (of washing), and what to do about misbehaving bed slats. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-15•29mins
#8

Music

It's the battle of the bands this week as William and Jonathan show off their favourite “good and goey” tunes. Expect a typically macho selection as the two broaden their musical horizons - and have a singalong, too. Plus, there is advice on what to do when a spouse takes up the drums, and whether a Eurovision party is ever acceptable. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-14•47mins

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#9

Lynsey Queen of Clean, Part 2

In another special bonus episode, William and Jonathan round off their chat with social media cleaning star Lynsey Queen of Clean (This Morning, Channel 5's Gadget Show, Ireland's Today Show). The three discuss how to cope with dirty bathrooms, holiday homes and headboards. Jonathan and Lynsey also swap some shocking cleaning-related injuries. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-08•36mins
#10

Weddings

As we edge into wedding season, William and Jonathan discuss the right and wrong way to have a luxury wedding. They cover everything from seating plans and scheduling, to coping with rowdy guests. Plus, controversy abounds as William's approach to his own wedding gifts comes under the spotlight. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-07•32mins
#11

Lynsey Queen of Clean, Part 1

In a very special bonus episode of The Luxury Podcast, William and Jonathan are joined by social media cleaning star Lynsey Queen of Clean, also seen on This Morning, Channel 5’s Gadget Show and Ireland’s The Today Show. The three compare their cleaning obsessions and swap tips and tricks - including how to handle a rogue sausage in the bedroom. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-01•27mins
#12

Royalty

William and Jonathan discuss royalty. William gives a short (Jonathan might disagree) history of The Royal Family, and Jonathan shares his suspicions that he has blue blood. Plus, the two discuss their favourite royals, and tackle some of your questions. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-30•36mins
#13

Cutlery and Canine Care

In this week's bonus episode, William and Jonathan compare their cutlery collections, and Jonathan tells a story about being trapped in limbo at a John Lewis. Plus, the two discuss how to confront a neighbour who doesn't clean up after their dog. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-24•25mins
#14

Workplaces

William and Jonathan discuss working life. The two tackle workplace etiquette: where to eat food, how to carry out calls, and what time to arrive. Plus, Jonathan demonstrates his method for stopping his colleagues from stealing his seat, and shares his opinion on lunch breaks. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-23•35mins
#15

William & Jonathan Vs. Estate Agents

William and Jonathan swap horror stories about estate agents, including one in particular that made Jonathan the angriest he's ever been. Plus, the two provide some cutting-edge etiquette tips on the appropriate times to send voice notes. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-17•22mins
#16

Lighting

William and Jonathan discuss lighting. From the most sophisticated number of lumens, to whether wifi bulbs are common, the two explore how to keep one's home exquisitely well lit. Plus, they plan to ditch the recording studio in favour for a KFC restaurant. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-16•35mins
#17

Bin Days and Hotel Stays

In this week's bonus episode, William and Jonathan discuss how to keep one's wheelie bin spotless, and give some advice on how to spruce up a hotel room. Plus, they hold nothing back in a very frank assessment of their favourite kitchen utensils. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-10•24mins
#18

Pets

This week, William and Jonathan talk about their little furry friends in great detail. The two discuss which dog breeds are the smartest, how to maintain animal hygiene, and how to train a pet to be as sophisticated as possible. Plus, the two try and solve the mysterious deaths of William's childhood pets. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-09•45mins
#19

Papal Protocol and Hotel Hustling

In this week's bonus episode, William and Jonathan discuss the proper way to behave when visiting the Vatican. Plus, Jonathan shares his tips on securing a luxury hotel room upgrade, and William gives a full review of his car valet. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-03•27mins
#20

Living Rooms

William and Jonathan discuss living rooms - or are they drawing rooms, or lounges? The two tackle everything from what makes a sofa sophisticated, to how to properly display one's television. Plus, Jonathan recalls a moment of childhood inebriation, and William continues planning for retirement. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-02•37mins
#21

Car Cleanliness and Eating Abroad

In this bonus episode, William and Jonathan swap opinions on foreign food, and discuss how to best inspire sophistication in others. They also puzzle over a mysterious new feature in William’s car valet. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-27•24mins
#22

Theatre

William and Jonathan discuss the theatre. Whether it be a pre-show supper, the clothes, or the correct play watching etiquette, the two define the qualities that make a sophisticated theatregoer. Plus, they discuss musicals - with Jonathan feeling very strongly about one particular title. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-26•40mins
#23

Childhood Hobbies and Swimming Pool Modelling

In this bonus episode, William and Jonathan once again dive into William's illustrious past as a swimming pool model. They continue this trip down memory lane by swapping notes on their childhood hobbies - William's media dynasties, and Jonathan's house visits from the police. Such commonplace childhoods. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-20•20mins

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#24

Gardens

William and Jonathan discuss gardens - everything from delicate flowers, to water features, to correct lawn mowing etiquette. Plus, Jonathan tells a shocking story about a dead pigeon, and an even more shocking one about when he set his brother on fire. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-19•39mins
#25

Water, Wine and Books In The Bathroom

In this bonus episode, William and Jonathan discuss whether its acceptable to multitask while using the lavatory, and how to deal with disruptive plane passengers. Plus, they tackle the fallout from Jonathan's controversial views on water bottles. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-13•22mins
#26

Bodily Functions

William and Jonathan discuss everything to do with the body. Farting, burping, and even the proper way to blow one's nose - the two tackle all these uncouth subjects in a bid to find the most luxury approaches to personal hygiene. Also, Jonathan reminisces about some very unusual flatmates, and William celebrates the many uses of Vaseline. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-12•39mins
#27

Secondhand Shopping and Nomadic Luxury

In this bonus episode of The Luxury Podcast, William and Jonathan discuss the correct way to clean a toilet brush, and when it's acceptable to wear second-hand clothes. Plus, the two try and bring a bit more luxury to a listener's very alternative lifestyle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-06•24mins
#28

Bathrooms

William and Jonathan discuss bathrooms. They discuss the different décor options, disagree on blue shell walls, and swap cleaning tips. Plus, Jonathan shares some candid stories about his time as a hotel chambermaid, and William comes under attack for his makeup choices. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-05•42mins
#29

Water Bottle Etiquette and Workplace Attire

William and Jonathan celebrate the inaugural Luxury Podcast bonus episode by announcing the charity auction of a very special piece of Keeping Up Appearances memorabilia. Listen to the podcast to learn more, and click the link below to get bidding: the two discuss appropriate workplace attire, and Jonathan voices his concerns about the abundance of water bottles in modern culture. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-27•21mins
#30

Home Security

William and Jonathan discuss security and give tips on how to protect one’s life of luxury. They discuss the pros and cons of security smoke systems, whether hiring a house sitter is ever acceptable, and William shares his parents’ unusual alarm system. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-26•44mins
#31

Kitchens

William and Jonathan talk all things kitchens - including surfaces, sinks and sprays. Jonathan explains why he refuses to cook inside, and William raises eyebrows when he critiques the nation’s favourite new appliance: the air fryer. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-19•45mins
#32

Cars

Buckle up as William and Jonathan discuss cars - makes, models and mod-cons. William grapples with an imbalance in presenter expertise, and Jonathan shares a story of a decidedly unsophisticated train journey. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-12•41mins
#33

Candlelight Suppers

William and Jonathan discuss dinner parties - who’s invited, how often, and what food and drink is appropriate for a truly luxury ‘Candlelight’ supper. Plus, William reads from his Host Book, and Jonathan performs a dazzling party trick featuring a pair of false teeth. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-05•47mins
#34

Bedrooms

In each episode of The Luxury Podcast, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith will tackle an area of life that they think you should upgrade, helping you create the everyday moments of luxury that make life worth living, and sorting the Onslows from the Hyacinths. Join William and Jonathan as they advise the nation in gracious living, and help you to live a more luxury life. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-01-29•51mins
#35

S05 E12: A Luxury Christmas Bauble

"We must never move; we'd be greatly missed." William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith are back for Christmas 2024 with a special episode discussing Dame Patricia Routledge and Roy Clarke's interviews for BBC4's Remembering series. Not only that, they chat with the owner of the Rover 216 (in tonic blue) and give some exciting luxury news for 2025. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-12-18•1hr 11mins
#36

S05 BONUS E11: Final Reflections

For the final executive bonus episode of The Luxury Podcast, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith reflect on their favourite moments from the hit tv series Keeping Up Appearances, as well as their favourite moments from the podcast. They tally up all of Rose’s lovers, debate their favourite episodes from each series and share a highlight from the pilot episode that has never been heard before. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-06-13•40mins
#37

S05 E11: The Pageant

Brush up on your royal protocol and prepare to curtsy as William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss the final ever episode of Keeping Up Appearances, 'The Pageant'. Hyacinth takes the lead for the church’s annual pageant ‘Our Town In The Civil War.’ Disaster strikes when Hyacinth realises all the volunteers have made wild excuses and not turned up, so she is forced to recruit the less desirable members of the family. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-06-12•55mins
#38

S05 BONUS E10: The Episodes That Never Were

William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith read the synopses of the plots written by Harrold Snoad for Keeping Up Appearances that were never made for television (a huge shame!) and imagine what could have been.This episode was recorded before the sad death of Harold Snoad, producer/director of the BBC series. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-06-06•36mins
#39

S05 E10: The Hostess

Prepare yourself to master your craft and sparkle incandescently at future candlelight suppers as William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss the tenth episode of series 5 of Keeping Up Appearances, 'The Hostess'. Hyacinth has taken an advertisement in the paper to offer up her services in educating the nation in gracious living. However, due to some innocent yet suspect wording, Hyacinth is hired for more than she had bargained. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-06-05•36mins
#40

S05 BONUS E09: Behind the Candelabra with The Milkman

In this special bonus episode of The Luxury Podcast, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith welcome the expert of all things sterilised and pasteurised, it’s Robert Rawles who played The Milkman in Keeping Up Appearances. Robert explains how he got the role, his first encounter with Dame Patricia Routledge and some of his most memorable moments on set.www.robrawles.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-30•21mins
#41

S05 E09: The Rolls-Royce

Ready your nostrils for the finest upholstery and sheer sumptuousness of the ride, as William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss the ninth episode of series 5 of Keeping Up Appearances, The Rolls-Royce. Hyacinth is outraged when she comes second place with her freestyle floral decoration for a table centre piece comes second to Lydia Hawksworth who upstages her twice over with her brand new luxury car. Hyacinth decides to take revenge by recruiting Richard who ends up in a brush with the law. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-29•32mins
#42

S05 BONUS E08: Hyacinth's Tidbits

In today’s bonus episode of The Luxury Podcast, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss Dame Patricia Routledge and Clive Swift's work outside of Keeping Up Appearances. Dame Patricia played Kitty in a number of sketches that may have inspired the character and traits of Hyacinth. Clive Swift gets caught in a bad mood during an interview and the Young Hyacinth spin-off is met with criticism from Jonathan.Watch the Kitty Sketches on Youtube: Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-23•25mins
#43

S05 E08: A Barbecue At Violet's

Raid your wardrobe and prepare yourself for a superlative summer evening brimming with caviar, Champagne, quails’ eggs and cut glass finger bowls, as William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss the eighth episode of series 5 of Keeping Up Appearances, A Barbecue At Violet’s. Sister Violet is having marital troubles, so Hyacinth seizes the opportunity to throw a BBQ and invite Elizabeth and Emmet as a way of convincing him to involve her with the upcoming performance of The Boyfriend. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-22•51mins
#44

S05 BONUS E07: Behind the Candelabra with The Postman

In this special bonus episode of The Luxury Podcast, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith welcome the friendly and less terrified David Janson to the studio. David played The Postman in Keeping Up Appearances. They discuss David’s time outside Waney Elm with Patricia Routledge, as well as his other role in the live stage performance of Keeping Up Appearances and some interesting trips on the QE2. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-16•38mins
#45

S05 E07: The Boyfriend

Ready your vocals and do your best to impress as William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss the seventh episode of series 5 of Keeping Up Appearances, The Boyfriend. Emmet faces the full force of Hyacinth, as she tries to impress him and secure a place in the upcoming performance of the boyfriend. Daddy is on high alert at Camp Onlsow & Daisy, which requires Hyacinth to channel her inner General. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-15•33mins
#46

S05 BONUS E06: Patricia Routledge's Musical Moments of Excellence

It’s the sixth episode of The Luxury Podcast complete with genuine bonus embellishments. William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss Dame Patricia Routledge’s musical accomplishments including her performance of ‘I Want To Sing In Opera’ on the British television show ‘Wogan’.Watch Patricia Routledge’s performance of ‘I Want To Sing In Opera’ on YouTube: Patricia Routledge's performance of 'Marvellous Party' on YouTube: Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-09•26mins
#47

S05 E06: Country Estate Sale

Prepare yourself for a tipsy turn and grab your cheque book as William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith ensure they are fully brushed up on the correct way to address His Lordship, as they discuss the sixth episode of series 5 of Keeping Up Appearances, Country Estate Sale. Richard is having sleepless nights as Hyacinth prepares for an auction at a lord’s country estate. Hyacinth seems unclear of how auctions work, as she believes paying more increases the luxury. Elizabeth and Emmet are headed on a collision course with their favourite neighbours. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-08•33mins
#48

S05 BONUS E05: Anarchic Hyacinth: Mr Blobby and the Dutch Parody

In this episode of the Luxury Podcast’s executive bonus edition, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith discuss when another 90s hit TV character Mr Blobby pays Hyacinth and Richard a visit. In his usual fashion, disaster follows. William and Jonathan also take a look at a Dutch parody of Keeping Up Appearances.Mr Blobby meets Hyacinth Bucket: parody: Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-02•32mins
#49

S05 E05: Skis

Prepare ones self for a frosty reception, as William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith hit the imaginary slopes, as they discuss the fifth episode of series 5 of Keeping Up Appearances, Skis. It’s Richard's birthday and despite his lack of excitement, Hyacinth has prepared a very special gift for his big day. So special in fact, she insists on taking him and his present on a tour for all to see. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-05-01•47mins
#50

S05 BONUS E04: Behind the Candelabra with The Vicar’s Wife

In this episode of the Luxury Podcast’s second weekly serving, William Hanson and Jonathan Vernon-Smith are joined by a very special guest. It’s Marion Barron better known as The Vicar’s Wife! Marion takes William and Jonathan through the doors of the Vicarage and shares her experience of working on the hit sitcom. They discuss what The Vicar’s Wife might have been called over tea in the Royal Doulton with some executive munchettes, provided by Marion. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-04-25•39mins

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