Free Sex

#1

053 - Prioritise pleasure - Prishita Maheshwari-Aplin

How can we prioritise pleasure?My guest in this episode is Prishita Maheshwari-Aplin, a writer and queer community organiser. Having just written a book about the politics of pleasure, called Roses for Hedone, Prishita has a lot of deep thoughts about how we could structure our societies so we can pursue pleasure. You can see why I wanted to speak to them!It might be self-evident that a world of free sex includes the pursuit of pleasure, but I found talking about this with Prishita to be immensely illuminating. Once we started, I realised that for many of us sex is not always, or even often, really about pleasure at all. And, weirdly conversely, that it’s important to single out pleasure as a human experience to be fostered, because then you can start to see that it’s also about so much more than sex...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-06-01•51mins

053 - Prioritise pleasure - Prishita Maheshwari-Aplin

How can we prioritise pleasure?My guest in this episode is Prishita Maheshwari-Aplin, a writer and queer community organiser. Having just written a book about the politics of pleasure, called Roses for Hedone, Prishita has a lot of deep thoughts about how we could structure our societies so we can pursue pleasure. You can see why I wanted to speak to them!It might be self-evident that a world of free sex includes the pursuit of pleasure, but I found talking about this with Prishita to be immensely illuminating. Once we started, I realised that for many of us sex is not always, or even often, really about pleasure at all. And, weirdly conversely, that it’s important to single out pleasure as a human experience to be fostered, because then you can start to see that it’s also about so much more than sex...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-06-01•51mins

#1

#2

052 - Better flirting! - Alice McKee

What’s stopping us from flirting?My guest in this episode is Alice McKee, a playwright and documentary maker. Alice thinks we can build a world where people can have the sex they want if only we were all better at flirting. Are we too full of nerves and anxieties that we can’t even make a goofy joke?In our conversation Alice drew on her work as the writer of a play called Perverts. It’s set in a queer sex club and has played at three theatres over the past few years. The main character is down to f*ck, but less available for more emotionally vulnerable activities like flirting and love. So we had a fascinating chat about all this — including how it works specifically for lesbians, how writing exposes our vulnerabilities, and what Alice is working on next...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-25•46mins

052 - Better flirting! - Alice McKee

What’s stopping us from flirting?My guest in this episode is Alice McKee, a playwright and documentary maker. Alice thinks we can build a world where people can have the sex they want if only we were all better at flirting. Are we too full of nerves and anxieties that we can’t even make a goofy joke?In our conversation Alice drew on her work as the writer of a play called Perverts. It’s set in a queer sex club and has played at three theatres over the past few years. The main character is down to f*ck, but less available for more emotionally vulnerable activities like flirting and love. So we had a fascinating chat about all this — including how it works specifically for lesbians, how writing exposes our vulnerabilities, and what Alice is working on next...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-25•46mins

#2

#3

051 - AI girlfriends - Georgi Dimitrov

Can men use AI to learn how to seduce women?My guest in this episode is Georgi Dimitrov, founder of an AI platform that helps men to generate a fake woman, and then chat to her. Georgi knows that a lot of straight men struggle with texting, chatting, dating, and sex, and building relationships...But having spoken to Georgi I’m not sure he’s got the right answer. As you’ll hear in the interview, Georgi says Fantasy.ai can be a place where men can practice seduction, without stakes, fear or shame. But it sounded to me like the platform’s business model and AI model don’t challenge the sense of entitlement to women that many men have, don’t help men to listen to women, and don’t create realistic women. His all-male team also could undermine the labour of women in the adult industry. I’m sharing the episode with you because Georgi says he has an answer for how to build a world where people can have the sex they want. I don’t think it’s a good answer, but what do you think?Related episode: 025 - Sex robots - Heather ParryA transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-18•46mins

051 - AI girlfriends - Georgi Dimitrov

Can men use AI to learn how to seduce women?My guest in this episode is Georgi Dimitrov, founder of an AI platform that helps men to generate a fake woman, and then chat to her. Georgi knows that a lot of straight men struggle with texting, chatting, dating, and sex, and building relationships...But having spoken to Georgi I’m not sure he’s got the right answer. As you’ll hear in the interview, Georgi says Fantasy.ai can be a place where men can practice seduction, without stakes, fear or shame. But it sounded to me like the platform’s business model and AI model don’t challenge the sense of entitlement to women that many men have, don’t help men to listen to women, and don’t create realistic women. His all-male team also could undermine the labour of women in the adult industry. I’m sharing the episode with you because Georgi says he has an answer for how to build a world where people can have the sex they want. I don’t think it’s a good answer, but what do you think?Related episode: 025 - Sex robots - Heather ParryA transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-18•46mins

#3

#4

050 - BONUS: Sex spaces for all

To mark the milestone of hitting 50 episodes of Free Sex, I want to add my own idea for how we can build a world where people are free to have the sex they want.My proposal is delightfully simple and appropriately bonkers: let’s put a sex space on every high street in Britain. Yes, I’m serious. No, your granny probably won’t approve. Your neighbour will ask you to sign the petition against it. The prime minister will laugh you out of town. But I am really serious about this idea. Join me while I build the case...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-11•14mins

050 - BONUS: Sex spaces for all

To mark the milestone of hitting 50 episodes of Free Sex, I want to add my own idea for how we can build a world where people are free to have the sex they want.My proposal is delightfully simple and appropriately bonkers: let’s put a sex space on every high street in Britain. Yes, I’m serious. No, your granny probably won’t approve. Your neighbour will ask you to sign the petition against it. The prime minister will laugh you out of town. But I am really serious about this idea. Join me while I build the case...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-11•14mins

#4

#5

049 - Shame is good! - Dug Gaines

How can we educate people so they can enjoy their shameful desires?My guest in this episode is Dug Gaines, who is a living legend. For 50 years Dug has been running the Foot Fraternity, a network for people who love feet. More specifically, Dug himself is into asthenolagnia, which is arousal from perceived weakness, vulnerability, and humiliation — often wrapped up in shame.Having spent half a century helping others to explore their fetishes that are rooted in asthenolagnia, Dug has plenty to share. We talked about how society has opened up sexually since his adolescence in the 1960s, and yet how we still need to do more to help people who want to play sexually with humiliation and shame. It was an honour to interview Dug, and he’s such an entertaining speaker!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-04•39mins

049 - Shame is good! - Dug Gaines

How can we educate people so they can enjoy their shameful desires?My guest in this episode is Dug Gaines, who is a living legend. For 50 years Dug has been running the Foot Fraternity, a network for people who love feet. More specifically, Dug himself is into asthenolagnia, which is arousal from perceived weakness, vulnerability, and humiliation — often wrapped up in shame.Having spent half a century helping others to explore their fetishes that are rooted in asthenolagnia, Dug has plenty to share. We talked about how society has opened up sexually since his adolescence in the 1960s, and yet how we still need to do more to help people who want to play sexually with humiliation and shame. It was an honour to interview Dug, and he’s such an entertaining speaker!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-05-04•39mins

#5

#6

048 - A day without Instagram - Ruby Rare

What if we all quit watching influencers and met to discuss sex instead?My guest in this episode is Ruby Rare, who has a bone to pick with the internet. She’s built a huge online audience for her work as a sex educator, author, broadcaster, and public speaker. Ruby’s voice on sex and relationships is essential for our times, and it’s great that people can hear and see her ideas about sex online. But recently she’s been wondering: what if we turned away from our phones?Ruby and I had a meandering but fun conversation about the way the form of social media can pervert good messages about polyamory. Her answer for how to build a world of free sex is to put down our phones, get out of the house, and meet in town for a chat instead. I think you’ll really enjoy listening to Ruby make her case!Ruby’s book The Non-Monogamy Playbook is out now, and it’s fab.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-27•46mins

048 - A day without Instagram - Ruby Rare

What if we all quit watching influencers and met to discuss sex instead?My guest in this episode is Ruby Rare, who has a bone to pick with the internet. She’s built a huge online audience for her work as a sex educator, author, broadcaster, and public speaker. Ruby’s voice on sex and relationships is essential for our times, and it’s great that people can hear and see her ideas about sex online. But recently she’s been wondering: what if we turned away from our phones?Ruby and I had a meandering but fun conversation about the way the form of social media can pervert good messages about polyamory. Her answer for how to build a world of free sex is to put down our phones, get out of the house, and meet in town for a chat instead. I think you’ll really enjoy listening to Ruby make her case!Ruby’s book The Non-Monogamy Playbook is out now, and it’s fab.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-27•46mins

#6

#7

047 - Group sex - Leanne Yau

Is group sex the way to a better world?My guest in this episode is Leanne Yau, who runs the @polyphiliablog viral accounts across social media. Leanne is a polyamory educator who, among many other things, wants people to know more about group sex. Leanne told me how group sex and polyamory are different; and then we went on to discuss the social politics of it all. From the question of whether more people are getting into group sex to the need to de-stigmatise polyamory, Leanne has a lot to say! She also wants you to know that if group sex is something you fancy, you should try it — and Leanne can help you do it well. It’s a great conversation and Leanne is great fun as a guest!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-20•45mins

047 - Group sex - Leanne Yau

Is group sex the way to a better world?My guest in this episode is Leanne Yau, who runs the @polyphiliablog viral accounts across social media. Leanne is a polyamory educator who, among many other things, wants people to know more about group sex. Leanne told me how group sex and polyamory are different; and then we went on to discuss the social politics of it all. From the question of whether more people are getting into group sex to the need to de-stigmatise polyamory, Leanne has a lot to say! She also wants you to know that if group sex is something you fancy, you should try it — and Leanne can help you do it well. It’s a great conversation and Leanne is great fun as a guest!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-20•45mins

#7

#8

046 - Cost cutting - Matt Skully

Are sex events and fetish gear too expensive?My guest in this episode is Matt Skully, who’s a performer, curator, events producer and occasional sex worker. His heart is as big as his desires as dark—and he’s got a long list of ideas that could make sex more financially accessible to people. Fetish gear costs money, event tickets aren’t getting cheaper, and sometimes you have to travel big, expensive distances to get to the place where you can enjoy the sex you want. We don’t talk enough about how wealth inequality holds us back from sex (although check out episode 040 with Eva Oh!), so I was thrilled that Matt wanted to talk about this. I really enjoyed hearing about his experiences working the door in fetish clubs, and talking through his ideas for how we can build a world of free sex. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-13•53mins

046 - Cost cutting - Matt Skully

Are sex events and fetish gear too expensive?My guest in this episode is Matt Skully, who’s a performer, curator, events producer and occasional sex worker. His heart is as big as his desires as dark—and he’s got a long list of ideas that could make sex more financially accessible to people. Fetish gear costs money, event tickets aren’t getting cheaper, and sometimes you have to travel big, expensive distances to get to the place where you can enjoy the sex you want. We don’t talk enough about how wealth inequality holds us back from sex (although check out episode 040 with Eva Oh!), so I was thrilled that Matt wanted to talk about this. I really enjoyed hearing about his experiences working the door in fetish clubs, and talking through his ideas for how we can build a world of free sex. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-13•53mins

#8

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#9

045 - Be serious! - Anastasiia Fedorova

Can we find a way to take sex seriously?My guest in this episode is Anastasiia Fedorova, a latex lover and author of a book called Second Skin: Inside the Worlds of Fetish, Kink and Deviant Desire. Anastasiia takes her subject so seriously that she’s built it into her life—and written a whole book about it. I was fascinated to hear more about the research she’s done for the book, from fetishes for cars, monsters and medical gloves, as well as the classics such as feet, latex and leather. As a queer kinky person from Russia, Anastasiia also makes a good case for why it’s important to know the history and politics of sex topics.You can pre-order the book now, including from Bookshop.org.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-06•50mins

045 - Be serious! - Anastasiia Fedorova

Can we find a way to take sex seriously?My guest in this episode is Anastasiia Fedorova, a latex lover and author of a book called Second Skin: Inside the Worlds of Fetish, Kink and Deviant Desire. Anastasiia takes her subject so seriously that she’s built it into her life—and written a whole book about it. I was fascinated to hear more about the research she’s done for the book, from fetishes for cars, monsters and medical gloves, as well as the classics such as feet, latex and leather. As a queer kinky person from Russia, Anastasiia also makes a good case for why it’s important to know the history and politics of sex topics.You can pre-order the book now, including from Bookshop.org.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-04-06•50mins

#9

#10

044 - It’s complicated! - Sari van Anders

What if sexuality wasn’t a spectrum?My guest in this episode is Sari Van Anders, who is a very multi-faceted scientist and thinker. Drawing on her experience in behavioural science and neuroscience, plus gender and queer thinking, Sari and her team have built an incredibly refreshing concept for how we can think of ourselves as sexual beings.We tend to think of our gender and sex as one thing, and that we are attracted to others based on their gender and sex (eg, I’m a man who fancies men so I’m gay). But it’s much more complicated than that! Which is why I just say I’m ‘queer’! Sexual Configurations Theory (SCT), which is Sari’s idea, includes other factors like how many partners you fancy, how body parts are distinct from gender identities, and the relative strength of different kinks in making up our desire. I’d love to know what you think of SCT — listen to Sari and let me know ;) A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-30•50mins

044 - It’s complicated! - Sari van Anders

What if sexuality wasn’t a spectrum?My guest in this episode is Sari Van Anders, who is a very multi-faceted scientist and thinker. Drawing on her experience in behavioural science and neuroscience, plus gender and queer thinking, Sari and her team have built an incredibly refreshing concept for how we can think of ourselves as sexual beings.We tend to think of our gender and sex as one thing, and that we are attracted to others based on their gender and sex (eg, I’m a man who fancies men so I’m gay). But it’s much more complicated than that! Which is why I just say I’m ‘queer’! Sexual Configurations Theory (SCT), which is Sari’s idea, includes other factors like how many partners you fancy, how body parts are distinct from gender identities, and the relative strength of different kinks in making up our desire. I’d love to know what you think of SCT — listen to Sari and let me know ;) A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-30•50mins

#10

#11

043 - Licensed sex - Karl Verboten

How should we regulate sex clubs?My guest in this episode is Karl Verboten, one of the masterminds behind one of London’s greatest kink club nights, Klub Verboten.Karl told me the story of how Klub Verboten had to fight an archaic licensing system in order to hold parties that are sex-positive and safe at the same time. It’s a really fascinating story to do with local politics, legal regulations, the relationship between club promoters and the police — and it even involves kinky people sending sexy photos of themselves to the local council!Karl has discovered that good sex spaces require dialogue between promoters and the authorities. Together, Karl believes, they are creating a new culture around sex spaces that places ‘traditional knowledge’ from the kink community at its heart. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-24•47mins

043 - Licensed sex - Karl Verboten

How should we regulate sex clubs?My guest in this episode is Karl Verboten, one of the masterminds behind one of London’s greatest kink club nights, Klub Verboten.Karl told me the story of how Klub Verboten had to fight an archaic licensing system in order to hold parties that are sex-positive and safe at the same time. It’s a really fascinating story to do with local politics, legal regulations, the relationship between club promoters and the police — and it even involves kinky people sending sexy photos of themselves to the local council!Karl has discovered that good sex spaces require dialogue between promoters and the authorities. Together, Karl believes, they are creating a new culture around sex spaces that places ‘traditional knowledge’ from the kink community at its heart. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-24•47mins

#11

#12

042 - Tone shift - Zachary Zane

Are sex-positive people too self-righteous?My guest in this episode is Zachary Zane, a writer whose work focuses on sex and, well, his own experiences as a bisexual slut. Zach literally wrote the book on being a Boyslut.Zach came on Free Sex to talk about how writers like him (and me), and anyone else talking about sex politics, can improve how we talk about sex. If we are hoping to build a world of free sex, we need to share information about sex in a way that doesn’t alienate people or ‘call them out’. I was super interested in hearing Zach’s opinions on this, mixed with his own experiences of writing about sex. We even discussed the backlash to Zach’s writings about STIs, and how that was an example of why we need to talk about sex in a more loving and compassionate way.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-17•44mins

042 - Tone shift - Zachary Zane

Are sex-positive people too self-righteous?My guest in this episode is Zachary Zane, a writer whose work focuses on sex and, well, his own experiences as a bisexual slut. Zach literally wrote the book on being a Boyslut.Zach came on Free Sex to talk about how writers like him (and me), and anyone else talking about sex politics, can improve how we talk about sex. If we are hoping to build a world of free sex, we need to share information about sex in a way that doesn’t alienate people or ‘call them out’. I was super interested in hearing Zach’s opinions on this, mixed with his own experiences of writing about sex. We even discussed the backlash to Zach’s writings about STIs, and how that was an example of why we need to talk about sex in a more loving and compassionate way.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-17•44mins

#12

#13

BONUS: The rent is killing my sex life

What a dominatrix taught me about universal basic incomeThis is an audio version of an essay from the Free Sex Substack - subscribe now to receive my writing into your inbox, and to support my work.Would you join me in a thought experiment? We all have basic needs, such as food and shelter. And most of us have to cover these ourselves. Even though governments promise to provide our basic needs, people are starving and sleeping rough. We fudge through life trying to make sure we have somewhere nice to rest, and that we can go to bed on a full stomach. I’m thinking through the different freedoms that we each have due to the meeting of our basic needs. If I didn’t pay rent, would I have free sex? Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-10•13mins

BONUS: The rent is killing my sex life

What a dominatrix taught me about universal basic incomeThis is an audio version of an essay from the Free Sex Substack - subscribe now to receive my writing into your inbox, and to support my work.Would you join me in a thought experiment? We all have basic needs, such as food and shelter. And most of us have to cover these ourselves. Even though governments promise to provide our basic needs, people are starving and sleeping rough. We fudge through life trying to make sure we have somewhere nice to rest, and that we can go to bed on a full stomach. I’m thinking through the different freedoms that we each have due to the meeting of our basic needs. If I didn’t pay rent, would I have free sex? Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-10•13mins

#13

#14

040 - Free money is sexy - Eva Oh

What if we didn’t need to work to earn money?My guest in this episode is Eva Oh, a dominatrix who wants everyone to have their basic needs financially covered. This was such a philosophical conversation, and I loved it! Eva argues that we can build a world of free sex if we adopt a universal basic income — people would have more time to investigate their own sexuality, instead of having to work so hard just to cover their basic needs. She shared stories from her own life, including how her own fearlessness has helped her to grow a hugely successful career as a dominatrix. We don’t talk enough about how money (or lack of) holds us back from the sex that we want, so I’m grateful to Eva for bringing this issue onto the podcast. It sounds like a heavy topic, but in Eva’s hands it’s also fun and mind-expanding. Let me know what you think!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-10•50mins

040 - Free money is sexy - Eva Oh

What if we didn’t need to work to earn money?My guest in this episode is Eva Oh, a dominatrix who wants everyone to have their basic needs financially covered. This was such a philosophical conversation, and I loved it! Eva argues that we can build a world of free sex if we adopt a universal basic income — people would have more time to investigate their own sexuality, instead of having to work so hard just to cover their basic needs. She shared stories from her own life, including how her own fearlessness has helped her to grow a hugely successful career as a dominatrix. We don’t talk enough about how money (or lack of) holds us back from the sex that we want, so I’m grateful to Eva for bringing this issue onto the podcast. It sounds like a heavy topic, but in Eva’s hands it’s also fun and mind-expanding. Let me know what you think!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-10•50mins

#14

#15

039 - No normal - Silva Neves

How can we flip the script on what sex and relationships can be?My guest in this episode is Silva Neves, who is a psychosexual and relationships psychotherapist. Silva sees all sorts of clients with different challenges to do with sex and relationships, so he’s a fascinating person to talk to about free sex. His big idea is that we need to know ourselves without the influences of society. That’s a hard task, of course! But Silva broke it down for me. We talked about the power of films and stories, the question of what’s ‘natural’ when it comes to sex and relationships, and even how to resist answering the question ‘So when are you going to get married?’A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-03•47mins

039 - No normal - Silva Neves

How can we flip the script on what sex and relationships can be?My guest in this episode is Silva Neves, who is a psychosexual and relationships psychotherapist. Silva sees all sorts of clients with different challenges to do with sex and relationships, so he’s a fascinating person to talk to about free sex. His big idea is that we need to know ourselves without the influences of society. That’s a hard task, of course! But Silva broke it down for me. We talked about the power of films and stories, the question of what’s ‘natural’ when it comes to sex and relationships, and even how to resist answering the question ‘So when are you going to get married?’A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-03-03•47mins

#15

#16

038 - Kink as an identity - Richard Sprott

Should we change our sexuality labels?My guest in this episode is Richard Sprott, a psychologist and sexuality researcher. Richard’s been exploring human sexuality for 20 years but says he’s still “at the beginning” of understanding it. His principle, developing, idea is about ‘kink identity’—which could help us to get to a world of free sex.The idea is that our kink identities can be just as significant as our sexual orientations. In fact, for some people, much more so. Richard and his colleagues have used their findings from lots of studies to propose that we can place our sexualities into different themes of kink experience, namely sex, power, headspace and community. It’s a super interesting framing that could change how we view each other, sexually. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-24•51mins

038 - Kink as an identity - Richard Sprott

Should we change our sexuality labels?My guest in this episode is Richard Sprott, a psychologist and sexuality researcher. Richard’s been exploring human sexuality for 20 years but says he’s still “at the beginning” of understanding it. His principle, developing, idea is about ‘kink identity’—which could help us to get to a world of free sex.The idea is that our kink identities can be just as significant as our sexual orientations. In fact, for some people, much more so. Richard and his colleagues have used their findings from lots of studies to propose that we can place our sexualities into different themes of kink experience, namely sex, power, headspace and community. It’s a super interesting framing that could change how we view each other, sexually. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-24•51mins

#16

#17

037 - Channelling sexual energy - Kalah Hill

Do we all share a communal sexual energy that’s just waiting to be activated?My guest in this episode is Kalah Hill, and she thinks the answer is definitely yes! Kalah works with individuals and groups of people to help them to discover and channel their sexual energies. She’s all about rooting our sexual pleasures in our bodies, our spirits, our ecosystems and our histories. So she was a fascinating guest for Free Sex.We talked about how Kalah creates play parties, the history of ‘eros’ from the Ancient Greeks, the science of music and frequencies, and sex education. It was such a deep and interesting conversation, and I’d love to know what you think about Kalah’s ideas and practices. Let me know! A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-17•49mins

037 - Channelling sexual energy - Kalah Hill

Do we all share a communal sexual energy that’s just waiting to be activated?My guest in this episode is Kalah Hill, and she thinks the answer is definitely yes! Kalah works with individuals and groups of people to help them to discover and channel their sexual energies. She’s all about rooting our sexual pleasures in our bodies, our spirits, our ecosystems and our histories. So she was a fascinating guest for Free Sex.We talked about how Kalah creates play parties, the history of ‘eros’ from the Ancient Greeks, the science of music and frequencies, and sex education. It was such a deep and interesting conversation, and I’d love to know what you think about Kalah’s ideas and practices. Let me know! A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-17•49mins

#17

#18

036 - Sexy clubs - Diana Isi

How can we create non-judgemental sex clubs and dancefloors?My guest in this episode is Diana Isi, who is part of the underground queer scene in London. As a DJ, Diana helps to create precious spaces where people come together to feel good, feel sexy, to dance, to commune, to kiss and maybe more. Diana’s vision for free sex is spaces like this, which operate without judgement or labels or categories. She told me about her own experiences on the gay male scene and how they led her into the queer underground, her process for creating music that makes people want to fuck (or snog at least!), and about the politics of creating non-judgemental club nights. It was a deep and heartfelt conversation about something that’s essential for us both, and I’m grateful to Diana for joining me in that.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-10•47mins

036 - Sexy clubs - Diana Isi

How can we create non-judgemental sex clubs and dancefloors?My guest in this episode is Diana Isi, who is part of the underground queer scene in London. As a DJ, Diana helps to create precious spaces where people come together to feel good, feel sexy, to dance, to commune, to kiss and maybe more. Diana’s vision for free sex is spaces like this, which operate without judgement or labels or categories. She told me about her own experiences on the gay male scene and how they led her into the queer underground, her process for creating music that makes people want to fuck (or snog at least!), and about the politics of creating non-judgemental club nights. It was a deep and heartfelt conversation about something that’s essential for us both, and I’m grateful to Diana for joining me in that.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-10•47mins

#18

#19

035 - Foot shame - Adam Zmith

What if... we could suck toes without shame?In this episode, my producer Tash turns the mic on ME to ask me about my foot kink. I’ve just published a new book called Solemates: A History of Our Fetish for Feet, so Tash has a million questions for me about how it can help us to get to a world where we can suck toes without stressing out about it. Tash and I discuss shame, freedom, what is actually ‘sex’, and the double standard of what ‘sex’ means. I tell Tash about my own journey as a foot fetishist, and what it’s been like to talk and write so openly about this. It was weird to have the mic turned on me, but also a lot of fun. You can Solemates from the usual places and direct from the publisher here.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-03•46mins

035 - Foot shame - Adam Zmith

What if... we could suck toes without shame?In this episode, my producer Tash turns the mic on ME to ask me about my foot kink. I’ve just published a new book called Solemates: A History of Our Fetish for Feet, so Tash has a million questions for me about how it can help us to get to a world where we can suck toes without stressing out about it. Tash and I discuss shame, freedom, what is actually ‘sex’, and the double standard of what ‘sex’ means. I tell Tash about my own journey as a foot fetishist, and what it’s been like to talk and write so openly about this. It was weird to have the mic turned on me, but also a lot of fun. You can Solemates from the usual places and direct from the publisher here.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-03•46mins

#19

#20

034 - BONUS: My book about foot fetishes - Adam Zmith

This episode is an excerpt from my new book, Solemates: A History of Our Fetish for Feet, published by 404 Ink. You can buy the book from the usual places and direct from the publisher here.If you sign up to my newsletter I’ll send you a PDF of the text of the first chapter as a taster, too.The excerpt is read by me, and it’s the introduction chapter for the book. It introduces my fetish, and my deep interest in its history, as well as linking to popular culture. I’d love to hear what you think of this excerpt or the book as a whole if you get a chance to read it. Let me know!Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-03•23mins

034 - BONUS: My book about foot fetishes - Adam Zmith

This episode is an excerpt from my new book, Solemates: A History of Our Fetish for Feet, published by 404 Ink. You can buy the book from the usual places and direct from the publisher here.If you sign up to my newsletter I’ll send you a PDF of the text of the first chapter as a taster, too.The excerpt is read by me, and it’s the introduction chapter for the book. It introduces my fetish, and my deep interest in its history, as well as linking to popular culture. I’d love to hear what you think of this excerpt or the book as a whole if you get a chance to read it. Let me know!Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2025-02-03•23mins

#20

#21

033 - Open desires - Liam Wignall

What if... we could see everyone’s intimate sexual desires?My guest in this episode is Liam Wignall, a researcher, lecturer and writer specialising in the role of the internet in our sex lives, especially for kinky people. Liam’s got a fun idea: imagine if we all wore some X-ray specs that revealed everyone else’s sexual tastes. Liam thinks we could get to a world of free sex if only our desires were more visible. Liam and I tested out the idea of the XXX-ray sex specs in our conversation. We explored the power of the internet, the trouble with the internet, and the enduring stigma that we all live with. Liam was a fascinating and insightful guest, with a big imagination and loads of great examples. You can also buy his book, Kink In The Digital Age, which I really recommend.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-28•40mins

033 - Open desires - Liam Wignall

What if... we could see everyone’s intimate sexual desires?My guest in this episode is Liam Wignall, a researcher, lecturer and writer specialising in the role of the internet in our sex lives, especially for kinky people. Liam’s got a fun idea: imagine if we all wore some X-ray specs that revealed everyone else’s sexual tastes. Liam thinks we could get to a world of free sex if only our desires were more visible. Liam and I tested out the idea of the XXX-ray sex specs in our conversation. We explored the power of the internet, the trouble with the internet, and the enduring stigma that we all live with. Liam was a fascinating and insightful guest, with a big imagination and loads of great examples. You can also buy his book, Kink In The Digital Age, which I really recommend.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-28•40mins

#21

#22

032 - Free choice - Kitty Drake

Why do we desire what we desire?*This episode discusses sexual assault and an alleged case of rape*My guest in this episode is Kitty Drake, a journalist who interviews a lot of people about the sex they have. Kitty helped me to see that we could approach a free-sex world if we’re able to give ourselves over to sex while at the same time hold space for reflecting on why we fancy it. How are our desires shaped by the politics and societies that we live in?Kitty writes a regular column in The Guardian and recently published a fun and fascinating global sweep of peoples’ sex lives. Her work is influenced by feminist politics and deep thinkers, such as Susan Sontag and Amia Srinivasan. Let’s get thinking!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-20•41mins

032 - Free choice - Kitty Drake

Why do we desire what we desire?*This episode discusses sexual assault and an alleged case of rape*My guest in this episode is Kitty Drake, a journalist who interviews a lot of people about the sex they have. Kitty helped me to see that we could approach a free-sex world if we’re able to give ourselves over to sex while at the same time hold space for reflecting on why we fancy it. How are our desires shaped by the politics and societies that we live in?Kitty writes a regular column in The Guardian and recently published a fun and fascinating global sweep of peoples’ sex lives. Her work is influenced by feminist politics and deep thinkers, such as Susan Sontag and Amia Srinivasan. Let’s get thinking!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-20•41mins

#22

#23

031 - Denied sex - Claire Bates

How are people with learning disabilities held back from sex?My guest in this episode is Claire Bates who runs a network for people with learning disabilities, supporting them in sex and relationships. Through her work with Supported Loving Claire has tracked all the ways that people with disabilities are held back from the sex they want to have — whether it’s discriminatory laws or unhelpful staff in residential care homes.I learnt a lot from this conversation with Claire, about how the world of free sex would not be reached without including those with disabilities. Claire has specific policies, practices and laws that need to change, and important ways to think about sex for all types of people.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-13•36mins

031 - Denied sex - Claire Bates

How are people with learning disabilities held back from sex?My guest in this episode is Claire Bates who runs a network for people with learning disabilities, supporting them in sex and relationships. Through her work with Supported Loving Claire has tracked all the ways that people with disabilities are held back from the sex they want to have — whether it’s discriminatory laws or unhelpful staff in residential care homes.I learnt a lot from this conversation with Claire, about how the world of free sex would not be reached without including those with disabilities. Claire has specific policies, practices and laws that need to change, and important ways to think about sex for all types of people.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-13•36mins

#23

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#24

030 - ‘Clean’ bums - Henry Blest

What if you could have anal sex without the shit?My guest in this episode is Henry Blest, “the most ambitious bottom in London”. It says that on his LinkedIn profile, honestly! Henry and I talked about the realities of anal sex, from the slipperiness of the term ‘clean’ to ‘taboo tech’, which is technology that faces stigma when trying to solve our problems.Henry is one half of a duo who have invented a device that means people wanting to have anal sex would not have to douche in order to avoid faecal matter. Along with Anna Vybornova, Henry has co-founded the company Polari Labs; he and Anna are busy attracting investment and getting their device ready for the market in 2025. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-06•39mins

030 - ‘Clean’ bums - Henry Blest

What if you could have anal sex without the shit?My guest in this episode is Henry Blest, “the most ambitious bottom in London”. It says that on his LinkedIn profile, honestly! Henry and I talked about the realities of anal sex, from the slipperiness of the term ‘clean’ to ‘taboo tech’, which is technology that faces stigma when trying to solve our problems.Henry is one half of a duo who have invented a device that means people wanting to have anal sex would not have to douche in order to avoid faecal matter. Along with Anna Vybornova, Henry has co-founded the company Polari Labs; he and Anna are busy attracting investment and getting their device ready for the market in 2025. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-10-06•39mins

#24

#25

029 - Sex is boring - Tina Fetner

Why do we need social norms around sex?My guest in this episode is Tina Fetner, a sociologist who has studied peoples’ sex lives in Canada. Tina walked me through her research into the who, why, when and how of sex, including what she’s discovered about masturbation habits, promiscuity and porn. And then we got into a conversation about the social norms of sex, which we all seem to measure ourselves against.What intrigued me the most about Tina’s ideas was how they encouraged me to think about the basis of the ‘freedom’ in free sex. There are always going to be social norms, including rightly those that help us to take care of each other. So what kinds of social norms about freedom would be necessary for a world of free sex?A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-29•44mins

029 - Sex is boring - Tina Fetner

Why do we need social norms around sex?My guest in this episode is Tina Fetner, a sociologist who has studied peoples’ sex lives in Canada. Tina walked me through her research into the who, why, when and how of sex, including what she’s discovered about masturbation habits, promiscuity and porn. And then we got into a conversation about the social norms of sex, which we all seem to measure ourselves against.What intrigued me the most about Tina’s ideas was how they encouraged me to think about the basis of the ‘freedom’ in free sex. There are always going to be social norms, including rightly those that help us to take care of each other. So what kinds of social norms about freedom would be necessary for a world of free sex?A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-29•44mins

#25

#26

028 - Bi-curious play - Emma Sayle

What can bi-curious men learn from women?My guest in this episode is Emma Sayle who for two decades has been running glamorous sex parties that centre female pleasure. Many of the men who go to Emma’s Killing Kittens parties have wanted to play with other men, but feel some worries or shame about it. So now Emma is planning a party just for them.In this episode, Emma told me what she’s learnt from running Killing Kittens and how she intends to build a safe space for men to explore with each other. This involves creating a space with privacy and safety at its heart, and inclusion for all queer men, including trans men and nonbinary people. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-22•40mins

028 - Bi-curious play - Emma Sayle

What can bi-curious men learn from women?My guest in this episode is Emma Sayle who for two decades has been running glamorous sex parties that centre female pleasure. Many of the men who go to Emma’s Killing Kittens parties have wanted to play with other men, but feel some worries or shame about it. So now Emma is planning a party just for them.In this episode, Emma told me what she’s learnt from running Killing Kittens and how she intends to build a safe space for men to explore with each other. This involves creating a space with privacy and safety at its heart, and inclusion for all queer men, including trans men and nonbinary people. A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-22•40mins

#26

#27

027 - Blue pills - Phil Samba

When can we have all the sexual health services we need?My guest in this episode is Phil Samba, health promoter and the host of The Other Blue Pill podcast series. That show is about a pill called PrEP, which stops people getting HIV, and how campaigners fought legal battles for years to make it available to everyone in the UK. Phil is now trying to keep up that momentum in making all our sexual health needs available to everyone, in a way that works for them, all the time. Phil and I talked not only about HIV and PrEP, but also about doxyPEP which can help reduce your chances of other STIs, and about how sexual health is not enough of a political issue. Phil works for The Love Tank, which is an incredible community organisation campaigning for better sexual health in London—and it was a real treat to talk to him.Here are some resources: As a single gay man, here’s how I take control of my sex life by Phil SambaAll about PrEP and how to avoid HIVAll about DoxyPEP to avoid various STIsThe Other Blue Pill podcast series by Queer AFA transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-15•39mins

027 - Blue pills - Phil Samba

When can we have all the sexual health services we need?My guest in this episode is Phil Samba, health promoter and the host of The Other Blue Pill podcast series. That show is about a pill called PrEP, which stops people getting HIV, and how campaigners fought legal battles for years to make it available to everyone in the UK. Phil is now trying to keep up that momentum in making all our sexual health needs available to everyone, in a way that works for them, all the time. Phil and I talked not only about HIV and PrEP, but also about doxyPEP which can help reduce your chances of other STIs, and about how sexual health is not enough of a political issue. Phil works for The Love Tank, which is an incredible community organisation campaigning for better sexual health in London—and it was a real treat to talk to him.Here are some resources: As a single gay man, here’s how I take control of my sex life by Phil SambaAll about PrEP and how to avoid HIVAll about DoxyPEP to avoid various STIsThe Other Blue Pill podcast series by Queer AFA transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-15•39mins

#27

#28

026 - Queer hearts - Amanda Middleton

What can straight people learn from queer relationships?My guest in this episode is Amanda Middleton, a family and systemic psychotherapist. Amanda works with queer couples, families and polycules. Through decades of experience, she’s developed a fascinating practice that places queer attitudes at the heart of her work—and her insights now can benefit everybody.The point is that these queer approaches help us to get to a world where we can have the sex we want (not just queer sex, but freer sex). I also got to ask Amanda what she thinks of the idea of ‘compatibility’ when it comes to looking for a partner, or trying to make a relationship work. She had so many interesting things to say! A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-08•43mins

026 - Queer hearts - Amanda Middleton

What can straight people learn from queer relationships?My guest in this episode is Amanda Middleton, a family and systemic psychotherapist. Amanda works with queer couples, families and polycules. Through decades of experience, she’s developed a fascinating practice that places queer attitudes at the heart of her work—and her insights now can benefit everybody.The point is that these queer approaches help us to get to a world where we can have the sex we want (not just queer sex, but freer sex). I also got to ask Amanda what she thinks of the idea of ‘compatibility’ when it comes to looking for a partner, or trying to make a relationship work. She had so many interesting things to say! A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-09-08•43mins

#28

#29

025 - Sex robots - Heather Parry

Would sex robots be good for us?My guest in this episode is Heather Parry, who’s been wondering why we need sex robots. Heather is a writer of fiction and non-fiction, and she wrote a book called Electric Dreams: On Sex Robots and the Failed Promises of Capitalism. It’s a fascinating bipedal stroll through the growing industry of pimped-up sex dolls and the dreams of imagineers who predict a world with fleshy human-like sex robots.In researching the book Heather found that there are several factors connecting the people who want to have sex with robots, and that led her into an analysis of capitalism, gender, heterosexuality, and individualism. So that’s what we talked about in our conversation, with a mini diversion into whether or not Data from Star Trek produces semen.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-04-21•42mins

025 - Sex robots - Heather Parry

Would sex robots be good for us?My guest in this episode is Heather Parry, who’s been wondering why we need sex robots. Heather is a writer of fiction and non-fiction, and she wrote a book called Electric Dreams: On Sex Robots and the Failed Promises of Capitalism. It’s a fascinating bipedal stroll through the growing industry of pimped-up sex dolls and the dreams of imagineers who predict a world with fleshy human-like sex robots.In researching the book Heather found that there are several factors connecting the people who want to have sex with robots, and that led her into an analysis of capitalism, gender, heterosexuality, and individualism. So that’s what we talked about in our conversation, with a mini diversion into whether or not Data from Star Trek produces semen.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-04-21•42mins

#29

#30

024 - Maximum intimacy - Nick Woof

Can you be intimate with 200 people?My guest in this episode is Nick Woof, the founder of London’s edgiest erotic party, Bator Bros. The party is centred on the idea that we can enjoy intimacy and community in a sexual context. Imagine an orgy, but where you’re only allowed to use your hands (sorta). Nick explains how he developed the ideas that led to him to create this new type of sex party, and what we can all gain by thinking about intimacy and community differently. In Nick’s free sex world, community can involve erotic interaction, and intimacy can involve more than one person. It’s a really fascinating conversation with someone who is both a deep thinker and an action man (Nick also runs workshops to facilitate healing through creativity).Ready? 3, 2, 1, let’s go...To listen to Nick and some of the Bator Bros talk more about the party, listen to the recent Bator’s Journey radio broadcast.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-04-14•45mins

024 - Maximum intimacy - Nick Woof

Can you be intimate with 200 people?My guest in this episode is Nick Woof, the founder of London’s edgiest erotic party, Bator Bros. The party is centred on the idea that we can enjoy intimacy and community in a sexual context. Imagine an orgy, but where you’re only allowed to use your hands (sorta). Nick explains how he developed the ideas that led to him to create this new type of sex party, and what we can all gain by thinking about intimacy and community differently. In Nick’s free sex world, community can involve erotic interaction, and intimacy can involve more than one person. It’s a really fascinating conversation with someone who is both a deep thinker and an action man (Nick also runs workshops to facilitate healing through creativity).Ready? 3, 2, 1, let’s go...To listen to Nick and some of the Bator Bros talk more about the party, listen to the recent Bator’s Journey radio broadcast.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-04-14•45mins

#30

#31

023 - Older people - Hayley Conyers

Does age matter?My guest in this episode is Hayley Conyers, who has been working as a research assistant at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, and specifically on a study into the sexual health of older adults. Many people assume that older people aren’t having sex, or that if they are, that’s gross. Well, both of those things are wrong, aren’t they? A free sex world is a world where we can have and enjoy healthy sex well into old age, if we want.The project Hayley worked on encouraged lots of older and disabled people to talk about their experiences, together with doctors, medical researchers and social scientists. They came up with five recommendations for how sexual health services could be made better for older people — and some of the results may surprise you!The novel I mentioned in the episode is One Last Song by Nathan Evans.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-04-07•41mins

023 - Older people - Hayley Conyers

Does age matter?My guest in this episode is Hayley Conyers, who has been working as a research assistant at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, and specifically on a study into the sexual health of older adults. Many people assume that older people aren’t having sex, or that if they are, that’s gross. Well, both of those things are wrong, aren’t they? A free sex world is a world where we can have and enjoy healthy sex well into old age, if we want.The project Hayley worked on encouraged lots of older and disabled people to talk about their experiences, together with doctors, medical researchers and social scientists. They came up with five recommendations for how sexual health services could be made better for older people — and some of the results may surprise you!The novel I mentioned in the episode is One Last Song by Nathan Evans.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-04-07•41mins

#31

#32

022 - Slut power - Beth Ashley

How can we overcome slutshaming?My guest in this episode is Beth Ashley, author of Sluts: The Truth about Slutshaming and What We Can Do To Fight It. It’s a wide-ranging book that pulls together history, politics, class, identity, gender and activism, to try to understand the resurgence of slutshaming. Thankfully Beth also has tons of actions that we can all take to fight back.I remember telling my mum once that I like sex with different people, and she called me a slut. I laughed it off but, of course, I also remember the way she shamed me, don’t I? Slutshaming sticks, and we all need a shower. So let’s get wet, with Beth.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-31•51mins

022 - Slut power - Beth Ashley

How can we overcome slutshaming?My guest in this episode is Beth Ashley, author of Sluts: The Truth about Slutshaming and What We Can Do To Fight It. It’s a wide-ranging book that pulls together history, politics, class, identity, gender and activism, to try to understand the resurgence of slutshaming. Thankfully Beth also has tons of actions that we can all take to fight back.I remember telling my mum once that I like sex with different people, and she called me a slut. I laughed it off but, of course, I also remember the way she shamed me, don’t I? Slutshaming sticks, and we all need a shower. So let’s get wet, with Beth.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-31•51mins

#32

#33

021 - Bye bye, bisexual men - Lewis Oakley

Why don’t some women want to date bisexual men?My guest in this episode is Lewis Oakley, a bisexual activist. Lewis has experienced prejudice from women who tell him to his face that even if they like him, they won’t date him due to his history of gay sex. This is one of the many ways that biphobia not only endures, but seems to go unchecked. So Lewis is on a mission to change that attitude, through writing and speaking on the subject, and hosting the Bisexual Brunch podcast.He tells me about how UK equality and hate crime laws might be OK, but we still have a long way to go to treat bi people with the respect they deserve. A ‘free sex’ world is nothing without flourishing bisexuals! And thankfully Lewis has a bagful of suggestions of how we build a life free of biphobia. His book, Bisexuality: The Basics, is out in May.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-25•49mins

021 - Bye bye, bisexual men - Lewis Oakley

Why don’t some women want to date bisexual men?My guest in this episode is Lewis Oakley, a bisexual activist. Lewis has experienced prejudice from women who tell him to his face that even if they like him, they won’t date him due to his history of gay sex. This is one of the many ways that biphobia not only endures, but seems to go unchecked. So Lewis is on a mission to change that attitude, through writing and speaking on the subject, and hosting the Bisexual Brunch podcast.He tells me about how UK equality and hate crime laws might be OK, but we still have a long way to go to treat bi people with the respect they deserve. A ‘free sex’ world is nothing without flourishing bisexuals! And thankfully Lewis has a bagful of suggestions of how we build a life free of biphobia. His book, Bisexuality: The Basics, is out in May.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-25•49mins

#33

#34

020 - Sexual free speech - Pup Davey

Should we show off our kinky selves in public?My guest in this episode is Pup Davey, who is a pornstar and all-round kinky queer person. He makes a living from kinky sex videos and he wants the freedom to share them. Davey and I talked about the limits in society on our freedom to express ourselves sexually (especially if we’re kinky). This includes battling online censorship and wearing kinky clothes in the street. One of Davey’s stories is about a day he was wearing a pup collar in public, and a friend told him to hide it—should Davey have done that?That’s the question we explore in this episode. Enjoy it. Woof!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-18•34mins

020 - Sexual free speech - Pup Davey

Should we show off our kinky selves in public?My guest in this episode is Pup Davey, who is a pornstar and all-round kinky queer person. He makes a living from kinky sex videos and he wants the freedom to share them. Davey and I talked about the limits in society on our freedom to express ourselves sexually (especially if we’re kinky). This includes battling online censorship and wearing kinky clothes in the street. One of Davey’s stories is about a day he was wearing a pup collar in public, and a friend told him to hide it—should Davey have done that?That’s the question we explore in this episode. Enjoy it. Woof!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-18•34mins

#34

#35

019 - Too much sex - Mark Walton

Is it possible to have too much sex?My guest in this episode is Mark Walton, who thinks the answer is yes. Mark has a history of compulsive sexual behaviour. This wasn’t healthy for Mark, so to move forward he used a combination of therapy, groups, and the book Overcoming Sex Addiction by Thaddeus Birchhardt.Mark is very sex positive, and wants everyone to have the sex they want. But when it leads to negative behaviour patterns, he thinks we need to take care of each other better. Because of what he’s been through, Mark has plenty of ideas—ideas that will help us build a free sex world, with chances for self-reflection, peer support and good communication between partners. I’m really grateful to Mark for sharing his story in this very intimate and personal episode.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-11•43mins

019 - Too much sex - Mark Walton

Is it possible to have too much sex?My guest in this episode is Mark Walton, who thinks the answer is yes. Mark has a history of compulsive sexual behaviour. This wasn’t healthy for Mark, so to move forward he used a combination of therapy, groups, and the book Overcoming Sex Addiction by Thaddeus Birchhardt.Mark is very sex positive, and wants everyone to have the sex they want. But when it leads to negative behaviour patterns, he thinks we need to take care of each other better. Because of what he’s been through, Mark has plenty of ideas—ideas that will help us build a free sex world, with chances for self-reflection, peer support and good communication between partners. I’m really grateful to Mark for sharing his story in this very intimate and personal episode.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-11•43mins

#35

#36

018 - Fat sex - Gina Tonic

Will ‘body positivity’ actually end fatphobia?My guest in this episode is Gina Tonic, who is a writer and the host of The Polyester Podcast. Gina tells me that free sex would mean pleasure without limitation—and we talked a lot about how fatphobia limits us all. Gina walks me through fat liberation, why queer spaces are fat-friendly pioneers, the personal politics of fetishisation... and why ‘body positivity’ is usually just a buzzword to sell razors. Thanks to my listener Gianluca for recommending the topic of ‘fatness and sex’. I went straight to Gina with it, because I knew that as the editor of @thefatzine she would be all over it. If you want to recommend a topic or guest, please get in touch: [email protected] transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-04•42mins

018 - Fat sex - Gina Tonic

Will ‘body positivity’ actually end fatphobia?My guest in this episode is Gina Tonic, who is a writer and the host of The Polyester Podcast. Gina tells me that free sex would mean pleasure without limitation—and we talked a lot about how fatphobia limits us all. Gina walks me through fat liberation, why queer spaces are fat-friendly pioneers, the personal politics of fetishisation... and why ‘body positivity’ is usually just a buzzword to sell razors. Thanks to my listener Gianluca for recommending the topic of ‘fatness and sex’. I went straight to Gina with it, because I knew that as the editor of @thefatzine she would be all over it. If you want to recommend a topic or guest, please get in touch: [email protected] transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-03-04•42mins

#36

#37

017 - Big erection data - Dr Elliot Justin

Should doctors be prescribing orgasm?My guest in this episode is Dr Elliot Justin. Elliot has a background in emergency medicine, but recently he’s been busy inventing a pretty fancy cock ring. Elliot is really into men’s erectile fitness, because it can tell doctors like him a lot about the patient’s overall health. So the cock ring developed by his company, FirmTech, claims to be comfortable enough to be worn for long periods AND smart enough to collect data on things like blood flow. Elliot and I also talked about why doctors are shy about asking patients about their sex lives. Sexual function is correlated with sexual fitness, of course; and both can be powerful indicators of other things like cardiac fitness. Oh, and if you’re not a penis owner and don’t play with someone who is, I’d totally understand if you wanna sit this episode out ;)A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-26•39mins

017 - Big erection data - Dr Elliot Justin

Should doctors be prescribing orgasm?My guest in this episode is Dr Elliot Justin. Elliot has a background in emergency medicine, but recently he’s been busy inventing a pretty fancy cock ring. Elliot is really into men’s erectile fitness, because it can tell doctors like him a lot about the patient’s overall health. So the cock ring developed by his company, FirmTech, claims to be comfortable enough to be worn for long periods AND smart enough to collect data on things like blood flow. Elliot and I also talked about why doctors are shy about asking patients about their sex lives. Sexual function is correlated with sexual fitness, of course; and both can be powerful indicators of other things like cardiac fitness. Oh, and if you’re not a penis owner and don’t play with someone who is, I’d totally understand if you wanna sit this episode out ;)A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-26•39mins

#37

#38

016 - Masturbation for all - Vic Liu

My guest in this episode is Vic Liu, an artist and information designer who makes books that aim to make the world a little better. One way the world could be a little better is probably if we all had better wank-lives. Who needs a sex life, if your wank life is hot and fulfilling?One of Vic’s books is BANG!, which is a guide about masturbation for people of all genders and abilities. The book busts the myths that stop us busting our nuts, suggests various techniques to try on yourself, or a partner, and puts masturbation at the heart of a good relationship with your own body.Some days I think wanking could save us all. And thankfully Vic was on hand to show me how. Here we go.Content: this episode refers to stories of sexual assault.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-19•38mins

016 - Masturbation for all - Vic Liu

My guest in this episode is Vic Liu, an artist and information designer who makes books that aim to make the world a little better. One way the world could be a little better is probably if we all had better wank-lives. Who needs a sex life, if your wank life is hot and fulfilling?One of Vic’s books is BANG!, which is a guide about masturbation for people of all genders and abilities. The book busts the myths that stop us busting our nuts, suggests various techniques to try on yourself, or a partner, and puts masturbation at the heart of a good relationship with your own body.Some days I think wanking could save us all. And thankfully Vic was on hand to show me how. Here we go.Content: this episode refers to stories of sexual assault.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-19•38mins

#38

#39

015 - Poly possibility - Libro Levi Bridgeman

Could we have a polyamorous world?My guest in this episode is Libro Levi Bridgeman, a writer, performer, the editor of Hot Pencil Press, and a ‘solo poly’ person. Libro’s been on quite the journey with sex since the 80s—from butch dyke to nonbinary legend, and lots in between. Libro’s story is one of periodic monogamy, gender-affirming surgery, caring for others, and the freedom that can arrive in your 50s. They are provocative, inclusive—and dead entertaining. I loved discussing with them how a free-sex world would empower people to be the gender they are, and not force polyamorous people to say why they’re coming to the dinner party with this partner instead of that one.Any poly people out there, and anyone else: let me and Libro know what you think of our conversation.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-12•36mins

015 - Poly possibility - Libro Levi Bridgeman

Could we have a polyamorous world?My guest in this episode is Libro Levi Bridgeman, a writer, performer, the editor of Hot Pencil Press, and a ‘solo poly’ person. Libro’s been on quite the journey with sex since the 80s—from butch dyke to nonbinary legend, and lots in between. Libro’s story is one of periodic monogamy, gender-affirming surgery, caring for others, and the freedom that can arrive in your 50s. They are provocative, inclusive—and dead entertaining. I loved discussing with them how a free-sex world would empower people to be the gender they are, and not force polyamorous people to say why they’re coming to the dinner party with this partner instead of that one.Any poly people out there, and anyone else: let me and Libro know what you think of our conversation.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-12•36mins

#39

#40

014 - What do you like? - Susan Bratton

Can we make it easier to say what we want in sex? My guest in this episode is Susan Bratton. As an intimacy adviser and wellness expert, Susan has no end of talking techniques, libido botanicals, blood-flow supplements and sexual energy bars to help us all to have better sex. Susan’s having the best sex of her life in her 60s—and she wants you and me to share the joy!But better sex isn’t enough. Susan and I went... deeper. We discussed the conditions in society that weaken our sexual communication, why our ways of living don’t make us good listeners, and even how society stops us listening to ourselves. Speaking to me from her home in California, Susan set aside the idea of ‘better sex’, and instead joined me in building a better world. A better world for sex.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-05•41mins

014 - What do you like? - Susan Bratton

Can we make it easier to say what we want in sex? My guest in this episode is Susan Bratton. As an intimacy adviser and wellness expert, Susan has no end of talking techniques, libido botanicals, blood-flow supplements and sexual energy bars to help us all to have better sex. Susan’s having the best sex of her life in her 60s—and she wants you and me to share the joy!But better sex isn’t enough. Susan and I went... deeper. We discussed the conditions in society that weaken our sexual communication, why our ways of living don’t make us good listeners, and even how society stops us listening to ourselves. Speaking to me from her home in California, Susan set aside the idea of ‘better sex’, and instead joined me in building a better world. A better world for sex.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-02-05•41mins

#40

#41

013 - Take care - Dani Singer

How can we take care of each other? My guest in this episode is Dani Singer aka Dani Dinger, who is a performer, sex worker, activist and an expert in nightlife welfare. If you want to know how to run a good sex party, speak to Dani. They co-founded an agency called Safe Only to do exactly this. Dani and the folks at Safe Only have a deep understanding of how to mould space and time so that it is sexy and free, while also taking care of the people in it. After this episode I’m convinced that Dani’s ideas could help us to build a free-sex world by improving nightlife and sex work—centring them around care and welfare. From making dark rooms accessible to neurodivergent people to helping a client of sex work to unleash the person they really are, Dani’s answers to my questions blew me away. Here we go!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-29•40mins

013 - Take care - Dani Singer

How can we take care of each other? My guest in this episode is Dani Singer aka Dani Dinger, who is a performer, sex worker, activist and an expert in nightlife welfare. If you want to know how to run a good sex party, speak to Dani. They co-founded an agency called Safe Only to do exactly this. Dani and the folks at Safe Only have a deep understanding of how to mould space and time so that it is sexy and free, while also taking care of the people in it. After this episode I’m convinced that Dani’s ideas could help us to build a free-sex world by improving nightlife and sex work—centring them around care and welfare. From making dark rooms accessible to neurodivergent people to helping a client of sex work to unleash the person they really are, Dani’s answers to my questions blew me away. Here we go!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-29•40mins

#41

#42

012 - Pleasure for the good of our health - Jozef Shaw

Isn’t pleasure a part of good sexual health?My guest in this episode is Dr Jozef Shaw. Joe works in a hospital in London, practising sexual health, HIV and general internal medicine. He’s used to seeing patients with genital symptoms, giving them treatment, and then sending them home. But there’s so much that’s missing from this medicalised approach to sexual health...So Joe tells me his big idea for holistic services around sex, that include fighting infections of course, but also therapy, conversations about relationships, and even more support around pleasure. There are chronic funding shortfalls and political tensions over sexual health; all the more reason to reimagine how we do it, no?The doctor is ready for us now...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-22•38mins

012 - Pleasure for the good of our health - Jozef Shaw

Isn’t pleasure a part of good sexual health?My guest in this episode is Dr Jozef Shaw. Joe works in a hospital in London, practising sexual health, HIV and general internal medicine. He’s used to seeing patients with genital symptoms, giving them treatment, and then sending them home. But there’s so much that’s missing from this medicalised approach to sexual health...So Joe tells me his big idea for holistic services around sex, that include fighting infections of course, but also therapy, conversations about relationships, and even more support around pleasure. There are chronic funding shortfalls and political tensions over sexual health; all the more reason to reimagine how we do it, no?The doctor is ready for us now...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-22•38mins

#42

#43

011 - Kinky showtime - Dan Daw

How can a submissive disabled person get the sex they want?My guest in this episode is Dan Daw — an exquisite performer with huge ideas and an electrifying stage presence. They made The Dan Daw Show, which knocked my socks off the first time I saw it (I went back and saw it again!). Dan’s show feels like the world of free sex I’m craving, so I knew we had to speak about it. The show is also a smash hit, selling out theatres since 2021.Dan’s work is so special because it pulls down assumptions about disabled people and about kink, all at the same time. So I spoke to Dan about how they did this, and the unique insights that performers like them can bring to the conversation about free sex.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-15•41mins

011 - Kinky showtime - Dan Daw

How can a submissive disabled person get the sex they want?My guest in this episode is Dan Daw — an exquisite performer with huge ideas and an electrifying stage presence. They made The Dan Daw Show, which knocked my socks off the first time I saw it (I went back and saw it again!). Dan’s show feels like the world of free sex I’m craving, so I knew we had to speak about it. The show is also a smash hit, selling out theatres since 2021.Dan’s work is so special because it pulls down assumptions about disabled people and about kink, all at the same time. So I spoke to Dan about how they did this, and the unique insights that performers like them can bring to the conversation about free sex.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-15•41mins

#43

#44

010 - Less sex, please? - Rosie Wilby

Why are we having less sex?My guest in this episode is the author and comedian Rosie Wilby. Rosie is wondering why surveys are showing that people, especially the young ones, are having less sex than they used to. She’s also reflecting on how relationships change the kind of sex we fancy, and how the stereotypes of gay men and lesbians with regard to sex stand up to scrutiny... This was a really fun and funny chat, taking in the breadth of Rosie’s interests and our observations as a gay man and a lesbian. Let me know what you think!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. For Rosie’s book, see produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-08•38mins

010 - Less sex, please? - Rosie Wilby

Why are we having less sex?My guest in this episode is the author and comedian Rosie Wilby. Rosie is wondering why surveys are showing that people, especially the young ones, are having less sex than they used to. She’s also reflecting on how relationships change the kind of sex we fancy, and how the stereotypes of gay men and lesbians with regard to sex stand up to scrutiny... This was a really fun and funny chat, taking in the breadth of Rosie’s interests and our observations as a gay man and a lesbian. Let me know what you think!A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. For Rosie’s book, see produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-08•38mins

#44

#45

009 - Risk! - Tina Horn

Can we calculate risk at the same time as trying to nut with someone?My guest in this episode is Tina Horn, who is a writer and perv, just like me. She’s really into helping us all figure out how to reduce harm during sex and staying horny while also thinking about the risk of sex.I came across Tina when she was hosting a Wondery podcast called Operator, about the sex workers who ran phone lines in the 90s. She’s also the host-producer of Why Are People Into That?, a podcast about sex, kink, gender and love. And she’s a writer of articles and books about underground sexual politics, AND the sci-fi rebel comic book series SFSX, Safe Sex.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-01•38mins

009 - Risk! - Tina Horn

Can we calculate risk at the same time as trying to nut with someone?My guest in this episode is Tina Horn, who is a writer and perv, just like me. She’s really into helping us all figure out how to reduce harm during sex and staying horny while also thinking about the risk of sex.I came across Tina when she was hosting a Wondery podcast called Operator, about the sex workers who ran phone lines in the 90s. She’s also the host-producer of Why Are People Into That?, a podcast about sex, kink, gender and love. And she’s a writer of articles and books about underground sexual politics, AND the sci-fi rebel comic book series SFSX, Safe Sex.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2024-01-01•38mins

#45

#46

008 - Sex in Public - Jackson King

Why can’t we have sex in public?My guest in this episode is Jackson King, a writer, journalist and pro dom (professional dominant). Jackson’s way to free sex is through the political and public liberation of sex. In this interview, he breaks this all down for me: from legal rights, to the priorities of the LGBTQ+ movement, from what it means to have complete control over your own body, and to how sex cops are policing us. We talk about kinky sex parties, how sex was completely forgotten about during the Covid lockdowns, and why it’s weirdly acceptable to say at a dinner party that you’re “trying for a baby”, but not that you’re raw-dogging—when really it’s the same thing. You can find Jackson’s amazing writing and other work here.I hope that you enjoy this conversation with Jackson as much as I enjoyed taping it. Here you go!Here’s the essay Jackson refers to in the episode: Sex in Public by Lauren Berlant and Michael Warner.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-12-18•44mins

008 - Sex in Public - Jackson King

Why can’t we have sex in public?My guest in this episode is Jackson King, a writer, journalist and pro dom (professional dominant). Jackson’s way to free sex is through the political and public liberation of sex. In this interview, he breaks this all down for me: from legal rights, to the priorities of the LGBTQ+ movement, from what it means to have complete control over your own body, and to how sex cops are policing us. We talk about kinky sex parties, how sex was completely forgotten about during the Covid lockdowns, and why it’s weirdly acceptable to say at a dinner party that you’re “trying for a baby”, but not that you’re raw-dogging—when really it’s the same thing. You can find Jackson’s amazing writing and other work here.I hope that you enjoy this conversation with Jackson as much as I enjoyed taping it. Here you go!Here’s the essay Jackson refers to in the episode: Sex in Public by Lauren Berlant and Michael Warner.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-12-18•44mins

#46

#47

007 - Sex therapy - Dr Lori Beth Bisbey

How can therapy help us to have better sex?My guest in this episode is Dr Lori Beth Bisbey. Not gonna lie: since I watched Dr Lori counsel countless couples into opening up their relationship on a reality TV show called Open House: The Great British Sex Experiment, I’ve been a bit obsessed with her. Dr Lori has decades of experience as a therapist, specialising in sex and relationships (and especially kink stuff), and she’s got a brilliant way of communicating about all these complex factors. In this interview, Dr Lori shares her insights from 36 years of practice on how therapy can help with our sex lives, from threesomes to taboos, from BDSM to procreation. Your therapy journey starts here...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-12-11•45mins

007 - Sex therapy - Dr Lori Beth Bisbey

How can therapy help us to have better sex?My guest in this episode is Dr Lori Beth Bisbey. Not gonna lie: since I watched Dr Lori counsel countless couples into opening up their relationship on a reality TV show called Open House: The Great British Sex Experiment, I’ve been a bit obsessed with her. Dr Lori has decades of experience as a therapist, specialising in sex and relationships (and especially kink stuff), and she’s got a brilliant way of communicating about all these complex factors. In this interview, Dr Lori shares her insights from 36 years of practice on how therapy can help with our sex lives, from threesomes to taboos, from BDSM to procreation. Your therapy journey starts here...A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-12-11•45mins

#47

#48

006 - Gay shame - José Carlos Mejia

Can you imagine a world without any shame?My guest in this episode is José Carlos Mejia, who told me the three things we’d need to eliminate if we want to have free sex. Shame, judgement and expectation — they’re all heavy obstacles, but in José’s hands they just crumble. When I was developing the idea for this podcast, José was one of the people I spoke to. He thinks deeply and clearly about sex, so after a long coffee date with him I came away with the idea that became Free Sex. I knew that when I was ready to start recording, José was gonna be one of the first guests. And here he is.José lives in London, and writes and talks about HIV and mental health, with a number of sexual health organisations. AND he does a very busy day job in the NHS.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-12-04•49mins

006 - Gay shame - José Carlos Mejia

Can you imagine a world without any shame?My guest in this episode is José Carlos Mejia, who told me the three things we’d need to eliminate if we want to have free sex. Shame, judgement and expectation — they’re all heavy obstacles, but in José’s hands they just crumble. When I was developing the idea for this podcast, José was one of the people I spoke to. He thinks deeply and clearly about sex, so after a long coffee date with him I came away with the idea that became Free Sex. I knew that when I was ready to start recording, José was gonna be one of the first guests. And here he is.José lives in London, and writes and talks about HIV and mental health, with a number of sexual health organisations. AND he does a very busy day job in the NHS.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-12-04•49mins

#48

#49

005 - Sex health inequality - Dr Rageshri Dhairyawan

Why are South Asian people in the UK getting more STIs?My guest this episode is Dr Rageshri Dhairyawan. In treating her patients in HIV and sexual health in east London, UK, Rageshri noticed that STI diagnoses in South Asian people were growing, and that they have less knowledge of HIV than other groups do. When Rageshri researched what was going on, she was shocked to find that doctors have known about these ethnic inequalities in sexual health since the 1950s. Why hasn’t this disparity been fixed?In talking with me about how we create a world of free sex, Rageshri discusses what needs to be done so that sexual healthcare reaches different ethnic groups. She’s also working on a book about how some people go unheard in healthcare, due out in 2024.If you live in London, you can get a sexual health test here. For the rest of the UK, check the NHS website.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-11-27•36mins

005 - Sex health inequality - Dr Rageshri Dhairyawan

Why are South Asian people in the UK getting more STIs?My guest this episode is Dr Rageshri Dhairyawan. In treating her patients in HIV and sexual health in east London, UK, Rageshri noticed that STI diagnoses in South Asian people were growing, and that they have less knowledge of HIV than other groups do. When Rageshri researched what was going on, she was shocked to find that doctors have known about these ethnic inequalities in sexual health since the 1950s. Why hasn’t this disparity been fixed?In talking with me about how we create a world of free sex, Rageshri discusses what needs to be done so that sexual healthcare reaches different ethnic groups. She’s also working on a book about how some people go unheard in healthcare, due out in 2024.If you live in London, you can get a sexual health test here. For the rest of the UK, check the NHS website.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-11-27•36mins

#49

#50

004 - You’re not normal - Girl On The Net

Why do we want to be cool during sex?My guest this episode is Sarah from Girl On The Net — one of the hottest sex blogs in the world. Sarah is a lightning rod for peoples’ fantasies, and over 12 years running her blog she’s learnt what would be the things that help us create a free-sex world. So she and I discuss the removal of the pressure to be cool, clean and normal. Poo happens!Supported by fans on Patreon, Girl On The Net is an amazing and expansive independent universe of smut. Sarah writes steaming hot porn stories, commissions others to write their fantasies too, and also publishes audio porn because she wants porn to be more accessible.Thanks to Sarah from www.girlonthenet.com for this fun, filthy and futuristic interview.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-11-20•43mins

004 - You’re not normal - Girl On The Net

Why do we want to be cool during sex?My guest this episode is Sarah from Girl On The Net — one of the hottest sex blogs in the world. Sarah is a lightning rod for peoples’ fantasies, and over 12 years running her blog she’s learnt what would be the things that help us create a free-sex world. So she and I discuss the removal of the pressure to be cool, clean and normal. Poo happens!Supported by fans on Patreon, Girl On The Net is an amazing and expansive independent universe of smut. Sarah writes steaming hot porn stories, commissions others to write their fantasies too, and also publishes audio porn because she wants porn to be more accessible.Thanks to Sarah from www.girlonthenet.com for this fun, filthy and futuristic interview.A transcript of this episode is available on freesex.substack.com. Hosted, produced and edited by Adam ZmithMusic: Translife by OthonArtwork: photo of Borneo mealworm by @DamasterCarabus / design by Adam Zmith and Rebecka ÖbergExecutive Producer: Tash WalkerAn Aunt Nell Production Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2023-11-20•43mins

#50

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Podcast Summary

053 - Prioritise pleasure - Prishita Maheshwari-Aplin

053 - Prioritise pleasure - Prishita Maheshwari-Aplin

052 - Better flirting! - Alice McKee

052 - Better flirting! - Alice McKee

051 - AI girlfriends - Georgi Dimitrov

051 - AI girlfriends - Georgi Dimitrov

050 - BONUS: Sex spaces for all

050 - BONUS: Sex spaces for all

049 - Shame is good! - Dug Gaines

049 - Shame is good! - Dug Gaines

048 - A day without Instagram - Ruby Rare

048 - A day without Instagram - Ruby Rare

047 - Group sex - Leanne Yau

047 - Group sex - Leanne Yau

046 - Cost cutting - Matt Skully

046 - Cost cutting - Matt Skully

Listen to your favourite podcasts.

045 - Be serious! - Anastasiia Fedorova

045 - Be serious! - Anastasiia Fedorova

044 - It’s complicated! - Sari van Anders

044 - It’s complicated! - Sari van Anders

043 - Licensed sex - Karl Verboten

043 - Licensed sex - Karl Verboten

042 - Tone shift - Zachary Zane

042 - Tone shift - Zachary Zane

BONUS: The rent is killing my sex life

BONUS: The rent is killing my sex life

040 - Free money is sexy - Eva Oh

040 - Free money is sexy - Eva Oh

039 - No normal - Silva Neves

039 - No normal - Silva Neves

038 - Kink as an identity - Richard Sprott

038 - Kink as an identity - Richard Sprott

037 - Channelling sexual energy - Kalah Hill

037 - Channelling sexual energy - Kalah Hill

036 - Sexy clubs - Diana Isi

036 - Sexy clubs - Diana Isi

035 - Foot shame - Adam Zmith

035 - Foot shame - Adam Zmith

034 - BONUS: My book about foot fetishes - Adam Zmith

034 - BONUS: My book about foot fetishes - Adam Zmith

033 - Open desires - Liam Wignall

033 - Open desires - Liam Wignall

032 - Free choice - Kitty Drake

032 - Free choice - Kitty Drake

031 - Denied sex - Claire Bates

031 - Denied sex - Claire Bates

Listen to your favourite podcasts.

030 - ‘Clean’ bums - Henry Blest

030 - ‘Clean’ bums - Henry Blest

029 - Sex is boring - Tina Fetner

029 - Sex is boring - Tina Fetner

028 - Bi-curious play - Emma Sayle

028 - Bi-curious play - Emma Sayle

027 - Blue pills - Phil Samba

027 - Blue pills - Phil Samba

026 - Queer hearts - Amanda Middleton

026 - Queer hearts - Amanda Middleton

025 - Sex robots - Heather Parry

025 - Sex robots - Heather Parry

024 - Maximum intimacy - Nick Woof

024 - Maximum intimacy - Nick Woof

023 - Older people - Hayley Conyers

023 - Older people - Hayley Conyers

022 - Slut power - Beth Ashley

022 - Slut power - Beth Ashley

021 - Bye bye, bisexual men - Lewis Oakley

021 - Bye bye, bisexual men - Lewis Oakley

020 - Sexual free speech - Pup Davey

020 - Sexual free speech - Pup Davey

019 - Too much sex - Mark Walton

019 - Too much sex - Mark Walton

018 - Fat sex - Gina Tonic

018 - Fat sex - Gina Tonic

017 - Big erection data - Dr Elliot Justin

017 - Big erection data - Dr Elliot Justin

016 - Masturbation for all - Vic Liu

016 - Masturbation for all - Vic Liu